A New Year, A New Beginning.

First off, I'd like to wish everyone a very happy new year. I know I'm a few days late but things have been so hectic lately. Photographed above are my friends and I at my chalet up north in what I believe to be the most amazing bed ever manufactured. It is so grand, not only does it fit 7 people, but it should be featured on How It's Made (which is quite the awesome show!) My new years was very low key compared to years' passed. I've gone to reception halls, a cruise, cancun and so on. But I was very happy with celebrating this new year in a pair of sweats and an AA hoodie.  I am refraining from making a list of new years resolutions I am sure I will not uphold. Instead, this year I am making a mental note to set my mind to things and get them done. However monumental or trivial, I don't want to be a quitter. I want to complete whatever it is I start, and I want to be proud of my completion and of myself. In light of this new year I have been doing quite a bit of thinking...

The thoughts I have most frequently are of those I miss. Certain friends I have lost communication with or friends I am no longer close with have been on my mind. It is very sad to lose someone you once had such a strong connection with. A sense of sisterhood is lost and I believe that to be the greatest advantage of being a woman. We are able to connect with others in such a way that we wonder how this person isn't an actual sister. I have reminisced a lot lately on past escapades, outings and sleepovers and although that's all over now, it's comforting to know they will live on forever in my memories. Also, I am missing my 

father terribly. Every occasion or big event evokes many feeling in my mind and in my heart. I wish so badly he could see how well I'm doing for myself and how much I've grown. My chalet up north was actually his home before his passing and I find it difficult to stay there at times because it feels odd without him there, but in a sense, it connects me with him. I miss him everyday and I can only hope that he is with me everyday, smiling down on me and proud.

This post may seem slightly deeper than past posts, but I have been feeling an overflow of emotions throughout this break and I truly miss writing. It is such a release for me, and even though not many people read this, it's oddly comforting to write to anyone. I must say that for the past day, I have been completely enthralled.

My first movie of 2009 was probably the best movie I am going to see all year. Last night I saw Milk with my mother. If you have not seen, or heard of this film, it is an absolute MUST!! Sean Penn plays Harvey Milk, the first gay man to ever be elected a political figure. Having been openly gay, Milk was criticized and lost 4 elections, but in 1978, he finally won and changed the voice of the homosexual community not only in San Francisco, but around the world. After having spent nearly a year in office, Milk was assassinated by Dan White, a fellow supervisor and disgruntled man. Now that I have completed a synopsis of the film, it is important that I write about the acting. Sean Penn is so compelling in this film. I have never seen such convincing and committed acting in my life. This movie had me laughing and crying, with every emotion in between. Every single actor in this film pulled their weight and did a fantastic job. Josh Brolin portrayed Dan White in the most perfect way. Emile Hirsch and James Franco were also fantastic. I know I have not seen any other movies that have oscar buzz surrounding them (i.e The Wrestler), but if Sean Penn does not win an oscar for this role, I will be incredibly disappointed. I left this film feeling as though I should be doing something more with my life. We all fell insignificant because we are only one person in the world, but Harvey Milk is a perfect example that that type of mentality gets you, and everyone around you, no further in life. Harvey Milk was one gay man living in the Castro in San Francisco and he changed the voice of the gay community all over the globe forever. I am so overwhelmed by this film and this amazing man that he has evoked a sense of change in me. If I cannot make a global change, I can make a change in myself. Stigmas and stereotypes can be fought if we change one mind at a time. 

I guess it's pretty obvious that I loved the movie. I just wish that more actors aspired to be like Sean Penn. His career has yet to be awarded with an oscar and I believe this year, it is his turn. I also wish more films were as compelling and emotional as this. It's hard to see the world for what it truly is. It can be a very ugly place, with ugly people, not speaking physically of course. But those who are closed minded about sexual orientation, religion and race need to realize that there are worse situations and worse people to be worried about. We are only creating a world of hatred and enemies with this mind frame, and I truly believe that this is a year for change. A new year, a new start, a clean slate.  I have faith in this generation, and in the rest of the world that we are capable of this scary word called: change.

Throughout this post I have come to a realization, not only is it incredibly long (lol), but my new year's resolution is to change. In what way, I am not sure, and how big or small this change may be is completely up to time to tell. I've rambled on for long enough, but tell me...what would you change about the world or about yourself (not physical of course), and maybe you too will discover something incredible about yourself.

Until next time....

xox.